Monday, December 11, 2006

Holiday spirit

As the holidays are approaching, I am getting into the spirit. Saturday BuffaloBoy and I went to buy some Christmas trees. One for his house, one for mine. It was great to have help; he just lifted mine up and plopped it in the stand. So easy. Mine is now all done and decorated. His is in the stand, but not sure if he got any decorating done or not. The house looks lovely and I always enjoy getting all my special things out of storage.

While on the subject, I want to encourage everyone to give to their favorite charity or cause this season. Right here in my hometown there are people who are going to bed hungry at night. I've given a couple of ways this season and am always surprised that it makes me almost more happy than giving a material gift!

Friday, December 08, 2006

The fire is not out

Ever since The Torch and I decided to try to be friends, we’ve been in contact with emails, work-related projects, a dinner or two, lunch, etc. Every time I see him, I still am bowled over by the feelings I have for him. I’m more adjusted to it now, and it’s not keeping me up at night, but I still feel deeply for him.

The other day we went to lunch with a mutual friend who knows about my thoughts for him. After lunch she mentioned how he looks at me and how we are so perfect for each other. But unless he really undergoes a change and opens himself up to being with me, it’s status quo. And so I move on…

Why can't we be friends?

(written last night, but posted this morning)

Hi all and sorry for the lapse in writing once again. To catch you up, BuffaloBoy found himself in the doghouse over the Thanksgiving holiday. For the few weeks before, we had talked about two important things to me; my birthday and the fact that my mother and twin sister were coming into town. On the Friday night before the holiday week, Boy mentions that he will be out of town the night of my birthday. I was more hurt and disappointed than anything. After all, we have been dating for almost 6 months. He wanted to attend a party in another town and did not offer to change his plans.

While I’m old enough to handle my birthday by myself, I felt frustrated and confused since (in my opinion) we had talked about it for the weeks before. Luckily, some of my wonderful friends made sure my birthday was a success with a wonderful dinner and great conversation.

The other issue in the same time-frame that helped Boy’s doghouse status was the fact that he told me that he would meet my mother and sister for lunch while they were in town. Again, we had discussed this and I told him early that this was a “no obligation” invitation. But he seemed like he was very agreeable.

The Friday after Thanksgiving, I called Boy at the appointed time to tell him where and when to meet us that noontime. He begged off, saying he was “tired,” and would like to, but, you know, he just was tired. Uff!

Am I off base to expect that when you are a grown man, and you tell the woman you have been dating steadily that you will be at an appointed lunch, you will be there? Honestly, he should have just pulled up his socks, sucked it up and come out for one hour.

This leads me to the last part. Obviously there has never been a huge romantic attachment to the Boy, even though I’ve been enjoying his company. And with his actions (coupled with some other dates that have been begged off or done “later”) of the week, I’m pretty sure that he is simply enjoying my company too without any long-term thoughts.

While I know it’s only been 6 months of dating, I don’t want either one of us to get our feelings hurt, or waste our time. I like Boy, but long-term romance? I don’t think it’s in the cards for us.