Thankful for....

Sorry this is about a week late, but I wanted to make a list of what I'm thankful for:

• my family who are funny and supportive and loving
• my friends who are generous and kind and fun
• the fact that I have a roof over my head and food to eat
• books
• values my parents taught me
• my opportunity to try teaching this year

I could go on, but you get the idea. Hope all had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend.

darn it!

Well, I hate being ambivalent. I am enjoying time with BuffaloBoy, but when I shut my eyes and look into the future, I don't see a life with him. And my objective to dating is to have fun, yes, but also to find a partner, lover, friend who I can spend this next part of my life with.

So, do I break it off before someone gets hurt? Do I bring up a conversation so he knows what I'm thinking? Do I just relax and see what happens? After 5 months, I think it's time we decide where we're going.

And to tell the truth, I'm not sure Boy sees up long-term as well. I'm not HIS usual girl....I'm more intellectual, more "buttoned-up" if you will, more "mainstream." Arrgh.

One of my thoughts is to see what happens over the holidays when we will see each other a lot less. After my Italy trip, things seemed to be better on both sides. But lately I feel that the "honeymoon" is over and we are seeing each other in the real light. He is forgetful, disorganized, not into planning too much. All things that might eventually drive me up the wall.

On the flip side, his heart is warm and generous and his communication skills are very solid. Surely there must be someone else out there that has these traits, and who is more of a match for me??

Housekeeping 101

Well, Saturday night BuffaloBoy made me dinner at his house. We usually hang out at my place for the sheer convenience of it all, and the fact that Boy is vocal about not being a good housekeeper. I usually pooh-pooh that, saying that I like friends for who they are, not how they keep their house.

I arrived at the set time of about 7:30 and, surprise, Boy is not ready. In fact, he hasn't showered yet, telling me that he has been running around cleaning and cooking all day. He has also already broken into the wine, using some of it to marinade the lamb (delicious!) and has had a glass himself. I volunteer to go grab another bottle while he pops into the shower.

As I arrive back at his crib, I see him in the backyard working feverishly at the grill. The lamb smells divine (he actually is a good cook) and I can't wait for dinner.

When I walk inside, I am amazed at the kitchen. Even though he has sworn that he has been working "all day," to a girl's eyes, it just doesn't look like it. Fast forward to his thoughts that he worked on his kitchen and bathroom, watched two movies on TV, went to the grocery twice and the drugstore once. So I figure his cleaning time, with all those distractions, was down to about 45 minutes. No wonder it still looked like a bachelor pad.

This got me thinking about different men I've dated and their different houses. The Torch's apartment is funky and cool, fairly neat and tidy. Much like his personality and owing to his job in the "arts." The Pilot's house was always neat and tidy too, which makes sense. He was a clothes horse and always dressed very particularly. The Accountant's house was a jumble. Papers everywhere and a pool table in the living room!

I promised the Boy that I would help him make a dent. Truly, it's not the "guy's apartment" right out of college that you swore you would never set foot in again. It just needs a little touch-up and he needs to learn some tip and tricks of the housekeeping trade. I guess that most men don't learn this from their moms like the girls do.

And so I move on....apparently with a dust cloth in my hand.

P.S. The dinner and evening were delightful.

Back in town

Well, this past weekend was the first weekend since I've been back from Italy (late Sept) that the BuffaloBoy and I haven't had any sort of date. No panic. He was out of town to see his family.

I had a good weekend, with lots of yard work, visits with my home-girls, and some down time. Sadly, my beloved Steelers lost on Sunday, so that put a crimp in the day.

This morning, Boy called to say hello and check to see if we still had a date to watch Monday Night Football. (For those who don't know, I'm a big football fan). I told him yes, and that I missed him over the weekend. That was big stuff for us. We are generally going slow and taking our time. Although, the conversation we had at the vineyard a week ago was moving us forward...or so I think from my position.

It will be interesting to see what happens next. We both are still smarting from other relationships (oh, Torch...), and are reluctant to get in to deep too fast. OK with me, most of the time, anyway.

I'll get to the details of the vineyard conversation in another post. Meanwhile, I move on.

You're 48, for cryin' out loud!

Back in the day, I dated a man (see blog entry entitled "A Date and a .38"). After a very immature kiss-off by him via email (email for goodness sake!), I thought that whole chapter was done.

Forward to about August when I get an email (another!) saying that he would like to be friends again, although he made it clear that he was dating another woman and it was going well. The generous, polite person I am, I said sure. We exchange a few emails, talk lightly about getting coffee, leave voice mails, but never seem to connect.

After an innocent email where I mentioned that he appeared in one of my dreams (very G-rated), I got back an email that was definitely R-rated. He said, "I hope I'm not overstepping my boundaries." I wrote back that yes, it was over the line, that I did not appreciate his thoughts, that I was dating a very nice man and that I was woman of integrity.

Instead of him apologizing for his somewhat 16-year-old behavior, he makes it my problem. Says that I was being too sensitive, that he was joking, that I can't take a joke, etc. He wrapped it up by saying that if I didn't respond to his email, he would know that I didn't want to talk to him anymore and that would be a "shame." For whom, I ask?

So I hit the "delete" button and forget about it. Two days later, here comes another email, again berating me for not being open enough to accept his comment as a joke. Oh, and that I needed was "obsessed with my old boyfriend and needed to move on." Then, a TEXT message. Arrgh. Then yesterday, another email. All deleted.

My question becomes, who really needs to move on here? Not me. Goodness. Go back to sixth grade.

And so, I do move on.